What are friends for?

My bud Michael Farnum has an interesting, yet naive post up about using friends as business contacts being potentially dangerous.  I think Michael being new to the "sales game" shows that he has a lot to learn about networking (I don't mean ethernet either), friendship and business. Michael's point is that when you "use" a friend to get into a potential new customer account, you run the risk of damaging the friendship if things don't go well.  My reply in short is, "nothing ventured, nothing gained", Michael.  But lets dig deeper.

I think there is a ton of business done through friends and acquaintances making introductions. In fact it is the norm rather than the exception. I also think it says a lot about you and your friends expectations around your friendship if you think that the fact that your companies products or services didn't work as planned would kill your friendship.  In sales this is a classic example of sales reluctance.  Many unsuccessful sales people suffer from sales reluctance and not wanting to risk a friendship is only one type of it.  Here is a chart inspired George Dudley, the founder of Behavior Science Press.  It is his dirty dozen of sales reluctance as explained by Sales Champions:

The Twelve Faces of Sales Call
Reluctance®

Type	Description	Statistics
Doomsayer	Wastes energy worrying about everything	Loses three new accounts each month
Over-Preparer	Always getting ready; overanalyzes, underacts	Sells only 43% of annual quota
Hyper-Pro	Over-concerned about image and credibility	Presentation skills rated only average
Stage Fright	Uncomfortable speaking before groups	Loses $10,800 in annual gross sales
Role Rejection	Feels guilt and shame associated with the sales career	Four fewer new accounts each month
Yielder	Fears doing anything which might be considered intrusive	Impedes success of TQM programs
Social Self Consciousness	Intimidated by “up-market” prospects with wealth, power or education	Sells 33% less of annual quota
Separationist	Uncomfortable enlisting friends to help network	Loses three new accounts per month
Unemancipated	Uncomfortable enlisting family to help network	Sells 15.5% less of annual quota
Referral Aversion	Hesitates to ask for referrals	Sales 19% under quota
Telephobia	Uncomfortable using the telephone to prospect or sell	Earns $10,000 less commissions annually
Oppositional Reflex	Emotionally unable to allow anyone to manage, coach advise or train	Defaults nine new accounts per year

Michael, you fall under the separationist category.  You are losing 3 new accounts every month!  What is interesting, is if the friends contact you, then it is OK to go in and try to "help" them.  What happens if it goes south from there?  Is your friendship OK because they came to you?  What difference does it make who came to whom.  If both parties recognize you are trying to help and doing your best, there should not be any long term effects to the friendship. Don't worry Michael there is still hope for you yet.

What about the rest of you?  Do you recognize any of your own traits in this chart?  Are any of these holding you back from success?  Don't think it is just selling products either.  Remember in one way or another we are all always selling.